Simone de Beauvoir - Changing Relationships Concepts
I am not a feminist, I’ve never been. Actually in my early years I used to have a lot of arguments with my sister, who was a feminist, that the whole concept of feminism IS the cause of split between man and women and that it harms women more than support them.
Today I will not go as far as that and certainly I do think that there is a difference between man and women, beyond the obvious, of what hangs where…
However, if there is one woman in the feminist movement that I always loved reading her work it was - Simone de Beauvoir and today nearly 100 years ago this remarkable woman was born.
We as women are indebted to her remarkable work and the sharpness of her observations. She has voiced, maybe for the first time, the importance of Feminine Leadership and what stops us in becoming leaders in our own right. Her ability to put the awareness on what IS and giving it a clear name has opened the door for women to start rethinking about our role, our place and our mission in life.
Simone de Beauvoir was born in Paris into a bourgeois family. Her father, Georges Bertrand de Beauvoir, was a lawyer, whose fortunes declined after World War I. Beauvoir’s mother, born Françoise Brasseur, was a devout Roman Catholic; she raised her daughters in a strict, traditional mode.
However, as an adolescent Simone de Beauvoir rejected the religious and social values of her family. Simone de Beauvoir was educated at Catholic girls’ schools. She then studied philosophy at the Sorbonne, where she met Sartre in 1928, eventually joining his circle, thus starting one of the most interesting relationships in the 20th century Simone partnered herself with Jean-Paul Sartre for 51 years although she did not marry him, nor would she live with him. With him she co-defined the concept of existentialism.
In The Second Sex published in 1949 in France, Simone de Beauvoir sets out a feminist existentialism which prescribes a moral revolution. As an existentialist, Simone de Beauvoir accepts the precept that existence precedes essence; hence one is not born a woman, but becomes one.
Her analysis focuses on the concept of “The Otherâ€?. Simone de Beauvoir argues that men had made women the “Other” in society by putting a false aura of “mystery” around them. And she argues that men used this as an excuse not to understand women or their problems and not to help them and to suppress them. It is the (social) construction of Woman as the typical “Otherâ€? that de Beauvoir identifies as fundamental to women’s oppression.
As always, in order to solve a problem you first need to become aware where the problem lies. Simone De Beauvoir concept of “The Other� allowed women to start coming out and demonstrating that they are equal and deserve the same rights as men.
Personally for me, the intriguing part about Simone de Beauvoir was her relationship with Sartre and maintaining an open relationship with him all those years. Even Simone De Beauvoir herself had declared that whatever her many books and literary prizes, whatever her role in the women’s movement or as an intellectual ambassador championing causes such as Algerian independence, her greatest achievement in life was her relationship with Sartre – philosopher and playwright.
Her relationship with Sartre demonstrates that love relationships can take different forms than those we grow up into believing. The typical “Prince saves Princess and they live happily ever after�.
When I was growing up in the 60s, Simone de Beauvoir and Jean-Paul Sartre were a model couple, already legendary creatures, rebels with a great many causes, and leaders of what could be called the first postwar youth movement: existentialism - a philosophy that rejected all absolutes and talked of freedom, authenticity, and difficult choices.
It had its own music and garb of sophisticated black which looked wonderful against a cafe backdrop. Sartre and De Beauvoir were its Bogart and Bacall, partners in a gloriously modern love affair lived out between jazz club, cafe and writing desk, with forays on to the platforms and streets of protest. Despite being united and bound by ideas, they remained unmarried and free to engage openly in any number of relationships. This radical departure from convention seemed breathtaking at the time.
For me her greatest contribution to women’s power was her relationship. Her ability to be a partner for more than 51 years with a powerful man and maintain her own power was her greatest contribution to women’s consciousness. Simone de Beauvoir has shown us an alternative model for relationships, where you can live your own life and contribute to the development of your partner(s).
If anything, Simone de Beauvoir is a model for me for relationships that are equal partnership and that allow both partners to grow and fulfill their potential constantly.
Today, as a tribute to this powerful woman, ask yourself, what is your ideal model for relationship?
